Forgive to be Forgiven

I used to be one of those people that wished they could stay mad for a long time. I am awful at the silent treatment, or staying mad for long periods of time without a second thought. I would hear my friends talk about how they would give their husbands or significant others the silent treatment for days at a time…and I admired their stamina but my reply would always be…What if something happens to them while you are mad because he won’t let the toilette seat down? That thought alone would get me every single time…What if something happened to him while I am mad at him? I have been to those funerals where people have held grudges for years against someone they love just to realize it’s not worth it, and there is no way to take it back….I have had people to do some of the worse things to me an against me but I have found that letting that go is the best thing to do for myself. Don’t get me wrong that doesn’t mean that I am foolish enough to let them back in my life at the same capacity they were before. That means that I don’t use energy on holding on to those angry feelings I would have to have in order to hold that grudge for long periods of time. One of the best things we as individuals can do for ourselves is to let go of unforgiveness and malice in our hearts towards anyone or a situation. Here is a HUGE example…I was molested by my step dad for three years of my life but I don’t have a hatred towards him. Now don’t get me wrong I don’t want to sit and have Sunday dinner with him or chit chat with him like he tries to do when he sees me but I don’t wish him any harm. I don’t spend my days hoping he runs off of a cliff. I had to let that go pretty early in my life because it was holding me down. It was holding my wings to tight for me to fly if that makes sense. Then as I grew more spiritually I learned how God forgives all of our transgressions, but if we can’t forgive others how can we expect Him to forgive us? Not only does God command us to forgive others for their transgressions against which is more than enough to make me want to be more forgiving in my life but have you noticed how people that hold grudges and hatred towards others are sickly people. It not only destroys you spiritually it can make you physically ill harboring all that inside. Something else I have found is that I would have to keep reminding myself how mad I am…I have to PURPOSELY stay angry about the situation. That means I would have to remind myself that I have to keep that part of me angry. That means that anger is taking up a piece of my heart where love can be…why waste heart space on hatred? We all have heard how it only takes one rotten apple to spoil the whole bunch well….that anger doesn’t just stay in one section of your heart before you know it has  spilled over into other areas and takes over your life. Don’t let anger, malice or unforgiveness take ownership of your mind, spirit, body or soul! Let go of those things and move on with your life as God intends it.