MEMOIRS OF AN IMPERFECT CHRISTIAN: Altitude Check

MEMOIRS OF AN IMPERFECT CHRISTIAN: Altitude Check: So how has everyone been doing with their altitude? Yesterday I did a brief post on how God's sense of humor instantly tested me on what...

Altitude Check

So how has everyone been doing with their altitude? Yesterday I did a brief post on how God's sense of humor instantly tested me on what I said we all should do. Yesterday I encountered 3 different people through my work day that, let's just say, aren't my favorite people for valid reasons but I won't do details because they may read this and it doesn't matter really. I had purposely not talked on the phone to get my spirit right before work, listened to some gospel and had thanked God for another day and first thing in the morning they came one by one. I am great at hellos and goodbyes but conversations when I'm not really fond or feel I have to be guarded with what I say are harder because of my face telling it all. I kept reminding myself of the words I wrote the night before and made more of an effort. I won't lie and say it was easy because I struggle with this. Not long ago the nation witnessed a young man hugging the woman who killed his brother...let's just say I'm no where near there. If I had to score myself I'd definitely get a B- to a high C. I took off for having to fix my facial expressions and my original "Dont talk to me!" thoughts but scored higher for engaging in chit chat. I have a lot of work to do. I also want to point out the Bible doesn't call on us to like each other but to LOVE. If my abusers came in contact with me we are not talking or having chatty conversation. I have forgiven them but I am not subjecting myself to their presence or conversation.(another blog) This is for simple day to day interactions that go on and if we claim to be Christians we need to LOVE as such. This is where Altitude Over Attitude goes into action. It's not because we're better BUT we SHOULD behave better. Disclaimer:I do want to clarify something. If someone has done bodily or mental harm STEER CLEAR. We are called to LOVE but not put up with abuse. You can love from a distance. Matthew 5:16 Even so, let your light shine before men; that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven

MEMOIRS OF AN IMPERFECT CHRISTIAN: Altitude over Attitude

MEMOIRS OF AN IMPERFECT CHRISTIAN: Altitude over Attitude: Am I the only one who wakes up somedays Altitude overwhelmed? By that I mean tired of taking the high road or being the bigger person that G...

MEMOIRS OF AN IMPERFECT CHRISTIAN: Altitude over Attitude

MEMOIRS OF AN IMPERFECT CHRISTIAN: Altitude over Attitude: Am I the only one who wakes up somedays Altitude overwhelmed? By that I mean tired of taking the high road or being the bigger person that G...

Altitude over Attitude

Am I the only one who wakes up somedays Altitude overwhelmed? By that I mean tired of taking the high road or being the bigger person that God calls on us to be. One of the hardest things to do is to be nice to people who aren't nice to you or that you honestly don't like. Last week in bible study we were talking about the difference between like and love. We all came to the conclusion that liking everyone is impossible for us all and some even struggled with loving everyone. No matter how much the pastor tried to explain we should dislike the action not the person the more our eyes rolled at the notion. What do you do on days like this? I retreat and save as much Altitude I can for my day to day dealings at work because you cant openly NOT LIKE your coworkers right? Here are some things I do. I am sure to have some one on one time with just me and God. I won't lie and say I get up early every day and read and meditate but I know for a fact when I do my mood and attitude is better. Then I listen to my favorite gospel singers. If Tasha Cobb or Tamela Mann don't move a stubborn attitude and soften the spirit I need to stay home that day. Lastly, I have to remember WHOSE child I am and represent. Those things are what make me speak to someone I would rather not, help someone that I know wouldn't help me or even overlook pettiness as if I don't know it was done. When we read about turning the other cheek this to me is part of what that looks like. Having ALTITUDE over ATTITUDE is the goal we all are shooting for. Do a daily ALTITUDE check before you leave the house daily because you never know when you'll be called to inspire that very person whose "spirit" you don't like. 🤗.

Being Imperfect Apology

Heyyyyy!!!! I am really kicking myself in the butt as I discovered that I had comments and people following me and my lack of knowledge didnt even realize it. I just discovered comments and messages from 2018! Wow! Now I know and letting you know I wasnt ignoring anyone and actually was feeling down that no one ever replies! It really lifted my spirits to see people were replying but made me mad at myself for not seeing the function I set up! If you dont already please follow my page on Facebook and I plan to begin a vlog next year because I love to talk. 🤗 I also believe we lack stuff like this for my age group and people striving daily to live holy before God but realizing we are still just people too. I will do better.

MEMOIRS OF AN IMPERFECT CHRISTIAN: Tis THE Season

MEMOIRS OF AN IMPERFECT CHRISTIAN: Tis THE Season: There is something about the holiday season that brings so much stress for the last few years for sure. It started the year my brother basic...

Tis THE Season

There is something about the holiday season that brings so much stress for the last few years for sure. It started the year my brother basically disassociated himself from the family so everyone was sad, mad or both. It felt like someone close had died although he's still here. (For the record I was just mad) Then every year following someone close died! Most times more than one person. Being in the Pastors family I dont think people realize the things we see, hear, or get called on for. We are expected to be a constant strength even when we are at our weakest moments ourselves. Then add life, in general, on top of that. I have always been a selfless person which sounds like a great thing in writing, and most times is. But being selfless can at times cause me to forget me because everyone else needs me. I have gotten better at taking time for me, oddly enough right now in my life my workplace is where I get the most emotional reset time because while I'm there I am not dealing with anything but work. Off work my brain is back on full "what needs to be done" mode and if there is a crises going on that is double brain energy. The thing I have realized is while all the craziness is going on if I don't have any time to spiritually plug in I am way worse off. Since the end of October I have been so emotionally drained. Now I'm just drained period. The thing is being drained doesnt make anything stop at all. My care about list is still in need of me. My husband still needs me to wife, the kids still need me to momma, the immediate family, which includes my friends, still needs me to Sharhonda and the list goes on. I have gotten to the point now where I feel like any wrong words said to me out the way by people whose behavior is usually ignored are going to get it full throttle no holds barred because I am using every inch of nice I have in my personal life on my care about list. Meanwhile, since I have noticed feeling this way I am going to start back taking some real time with God to get some real direction and understanding before I end up resentful of those things that tug at me. I know I'm not the only one who gets in this mind frame. I know there are many naysayers when it comes to God and in some cases spirituality but in my life experiences the only solution to when I feel like this is God and His divine intervention. The feelings only intensify the more I don't spend time meditating and praying So I am setting a personal goal for myself to take a break from day to day havoc to have a oneness with God before I go completely nuts. I compel you to do the same if any of the things I said in this blog sound familiar. Meanwhile, take care of you during this time and try to not blow up over holiday dinner.

Work Ethic

Some months back I had surgery and a couple of my besties were over keeping me company while my husband napped before his then night shift began. We had been talking for a while just about frivolous things. Then my husband woke up, he asked about lunch, then his coffee...had I saw this or that? This went on for about 30 minutes until it was time to leave and he stopped gave me a kiss goodbye, told me he loves me, would call me and left. One of my friends instantly said "Awwww that's so sweet how he gave you a kiss bye and said he loves you! I want a husband!" I looked with a blank stare and asked her DID YOU MISS THE 30 MINUTES OF CHAOS PRIOR TO THAT!" She had not really noticed that until I re-ran it to her and we all laughed about it! I told that story to give an example of what people see marriage like versus what it really feels like. I often have people that see our pages and public interactions that we share and comment how cute a couple we are and some say how they wish they were married. I absolutely a ree that we are an adorable couple hands down but I am always transparent about the work we are constantly doing on ourselves and our relationship. In society we are taught that love is all we need. I compel you to change your imagery of marriage before jumping that matrimony broom because although love is a must have, it alone is not enough to keep two people joined or not near as many marriages would end. Andre and I do have the advantage of history with one another so he knew I was crazy way beforehand. Not to mention being people who both have been married before we went in eyes wide open. I also sat down and told him every single fault I have. Then I admitted that he will definitely need to have a relationship with God because the only way those things would change would be through prayer because I was okay with my faults. He must have started right away. But he was willing to work through or accept those things. On the flip side I was willing to accept his as well. A made up mind to stay and work and fight through the not so cute times goes further than love. I know at times I am not so easy to love those are the times beyond love kicks in. My husband is my best friend but he also can drive me crazy like no one else can. But God+Love= a made up mind of dedication for me. So the next time you are looking at that cute couple on Facebook or wherever just know that although the cute love is real so is the work to keep it together. What is your work ethic when it comes to commitment?

He is All Knowing

Around 2016 I asked God to take away my dreams and really shut down a lot on my prayer life. To give some background I am fully aware of my spiritual gifts, and one of them is my dreams and God always tends to send me people (women) with like experiences to mine for me to talk to. I have random people that just pour their whole life and heart out to me, and it isn't because I always look approachable. I call these encounters appointments from God. But when I am not focused spiritually all my gifts shut down. So with that being said I was really irritated with my prayers over my personal life. It just seems like years of prayers just floating in the air. I even redirected it and still to no avail, but it seemed I was getting confirming dreams but they never manifested so I asked God to take the dreams and fell off a lot spiritually. Not so much that I didn't pray at all but it was nothing like normal. When I asked for prayers to go it's like it all got wiped away. Well, about a month and a half ago I realized that I am truly in a good headspace. I realized that God was not ignoring my prayers but was actually answering them the way He does, in His time, and beyond what I asked for in various parts of my life. I also see that if He would have answered the way I wanted I would not be the woman I am right now. My husband is an absolute blessing of course to me, but I also see the picture so much clearer for my life. When I came to that realization I said, "Ok God I'm ready, send me my next appointment!" I started back praying more diligently, my husband prays with me and for me and my growth. I haven't EVER had a mate to do that, and I definitely need it. He even prays over my Godly assignments. We have decided to be more diligent in praying over the children because we recognize at their various ages they all have struggles. But I also have started purposely talking to God every day, interceding in prayer beyond my immediate family. I have three people I pray specifically over after I asked them did they have something they want me to pray over, and God sent me my assignment! I forgot how focused and leveled I feel when I purposely seek God. I look forward to continued growth for me and my husband. I wrote this to not say it was ok to shut down but to let anyone know that we all hit rough spots. We all wonder if God is listening to us when we don't get the answers we THINK we should. I am far from a picture of perfection, I still have to purposely seek God and His wisdom, even when I don't feel like it. I am writing this to say God is waiting on you to realize He has your best interest in mind even when there is a delay, and to guide you in to your purpose. Don't give up like I did because even though He may not answer the way you want, His answer will exceed your desires.

The Merge Part II

A month or so ago I wrote part one talking about the challenges we have faced merging with the kids. The second half is merging with the family. The last few weeks I have realized that I am "family sheltered". Meaning I am used to the way my family dynamics are so I assumed for the most part all families function like us. When Andre and I started to officially date again I told my parents, and he started coming over more to get acquainted with our family dynamics and be subjected to the test of intentions. Once my family saw he loves me and I loved him AND it is real they accepted my husband with open arms. This didn't take long, they don't judge his past behaviors. All they care about is who he is now. My husband is a sweetheart, jokester, petty and a grump all in one and we all as a family are fine with him, just like we are with each others good points and flaws. In actuality, it was harder trying to date me than it was to get in good with my immediate family this includes the hard time my Daddy gave him just because he is real protective of his girls although we are grown women. We are definitely Daddy girls. We support and cheer each other on with any positive endeavors we face. We are not perfect and we get on each others nerves but ultimately we all have each others back and no one dare think they will mistreat any of us because we stand strong for each other including my husband, he is now part of that us. I will be honest and say that I knew things would not be the same on my husbands end of things. Call it a gut feeling, a gut feeling that I had to decide whether I was willing to deal with. I as a wife expect to get blamed for ANY AND EVERYTHING when it comes to my husband. If we leave a function early it has to be me. If we don't go, my fault. If he doesn't hang out, MY FAULT. Then add in assumptions that are made in regards to my personality. My husband is incredibly sweet to me and patient. When people aren't around us regularly they get the impression that I run all over him. I am constantly picking at him about this assumption because they obviously do not know him. He like most men CAN NOT be ran. Nonetheless, that is the dialogue and since that is the dialogue I am again the bad guy. Just to confirm of course I am very spoiled, my Daddy wouldn't have it any other way but I also spoil my husband. From the outside looking in my strong personality combined with my spoiledness looks like poor Andre doesn't have any chance, but he has a very functioning way to draw a line in the sand when it comes to me. He doesn't have to beat on his chest or declare his manhood, no real man does, but we work together to make decisions and he is very familiar with saying NO when he doesn't agree. Unfortunately, this isn't something that I think will change much in their thoughts and who I am as a person personality wise may not be their absolute cup of tea but in my delay to write this blog I became okay with that. Don't get me wrong I love my extended family but I also realize just like with my blood family loving people isn't always enough, nor does it change what they want to believe about you. Meanwhile, he and I are just learning to accept people for who they are and when we can dealing with them on that level. I know this isnt a feel good kind of blog because there is no happy resolve as of yet, but it is truly an important one to see if you are married or considering getting married in a similar situation. The biggest help has been us having each others best interest at heart and making unified decisions. We remember that we are each others priority first as God intended us to leave to cleave. Maybe at some point with growth and maybe time we all will honestly grow on each other.

The Merge Part 1

I previously wrote a blog summarizing our last 6 months as a married couple and how important it is to me for people that look at our love and wish for something similar to understand the effort and constant compromise that goes into this machine called The Abernathy's. I think it is important for people to be transparent and give information that can help others if at all possible. I stated before that my husband and I met as teenagers 14 and 15 years old. We had a couple of reconnect efforts through our adulthood that didn't work because we just weren't ready for one reason or another. With that time apart he and I both have previous marriages and kids. Combined we have 4 children, 25, 21, and 8 year old boys/men and a 16 year old girl. With these kids comes 1 ex wife that we have to deal with regularly(8 yr old), and from my side an ex husband(kids bio who isn't active) and kids dad(who raised them). We don't have to have any dialogue with the 25 year olds mom because he is 25. So let me take this back to our courtship. I was not an easy person to court because unlike my first marriage I was very aware of the effort that goes into a marriage and how even more complicated it becomes with children involved. The children generally are not the issue but more so the parents. So let me say none of our challenges have been a surprise but still were a major headache from day one in addition to just getting used to each others children and how they have been reared. Let's start with my end of things. When Andre and I started to see each other this last time I had just made a decision that I no longer was going to wait on someone to love me the way I knew I deserved, but he and I were/are still good friends and co-parents. He and I had been in an on and off again for 12 years, and I was very open with my husband about that time period and how we resolved to just be friends and co parents. I knew because of the kind of person my husband is this would be a bit of a struggle for him because 1 this man is not the kids biological father and two we truly are good friends and he is present in regards to the kids. In society now it is hard for people to believe that people that get along that well would not be together so my husband has pondered why it didn't work. The biggest issue has been him feeling like my kids dad didn't have boundaries. I am not a man so I most times thought my husband was being petty BUT would definitely listen to his concerns. As a result I address my kids dad about my husbands concerns and he respects it. My husband doesn't always know that I address these things because it's usually a result of a simple mention from my husband that lets me know something bugged him but as his wife I don't ever want him to feel disrespected from anyone on my end of this relationship. I also work extra hard to be more transparent. This used to be really easy for me as a younger woman, but I have to purposely be open to divulge information without feeling controlled. In return he knows that I hate feeling boxed in and gives me space. This has helped a lot with this particular area in our marriage. It doesn't mean I always agree but I respect what my husband feels because we all know that we cant control someone elses feelings. The next thing that has been work is my teenage daughter. I smile while I type this because I just know someone is reading already feeling the struggle before I even go in detail. Our boys are pretty mellow. They do dumb stuff here and there but their disposition is pretty steady. But the only girl in the bunch is her mommas child combined with puberty. One minute she will be skipping around here laughing and playful and the next you can barely get a hello out of her. She is a daddys girl, which means she is spoiled on top of being the only girl around her age in our immediate family at home and church. Well, my husband has never lived with a teenager let alone a moody teenage 16 year old girl. She makes him nuts lol "Baby why doesn't she come out until everyone is in bed? Baby why doesn't she ever come out of her room? Why is it dark in there?" My reply is usually the same, "She is a teenage girl" There have been times my husband has felt she was disrespectful or mean to him and came to me. I always recommend us all talk and resolve, mainly because everything I say to him he feels is me taking up for her. But when she talks for herself with no prompting he knows I am not taking up for her or making excuses. They hate that I do that but that to me is the only way. The kicker is he fusses at me when I fuss at her. There is NO WINNING lol But us all talking has improved the dynamics of the household, made her more aware of his feelings and is helping him get to know her better. So now lets talk about one of my fears that caused hesitation in us moving forward when we were dating, his 8 year olds mother. I knew before he did the struggle because again she was used to certain things with him and these things were no longer going to be happening. That's the short version. With that came instant resistance to allow my husband to see his son where this was not a problem prior to him declaring our relationship. Before you ask yes she is married, and I assume happy with who she is with but when people are used to treating you a certain way they get funny when that is no longer ok. Of course I became the big bad wolf in her eyes and we had to seek legal action. The good thing is we now have concrete visits, and it truly helps to keep the peace and a reasonable amount of time with the child. I again was not surprised but definitely not used to this sort of thing anymore and I got so irritated with it all. My husband and I of course had a couple of fall outs because we both were just frustrated. I even ended up in the ER I had got so mad at it all compiled with other extended family issue I had with 180/100 bp. This is when I had to really start to pray, and my husband and I decided this wouldn't be something that we would be arguing about because it's not about anyone but his son. Since we resolved it legally any shenanigans from there were minimal and ignored, again we realize we cant change her behavior but we can change how we react to it. In reading this I hope you see a beginning pattern that we have developed to acknowledge, address and resolve things immediately. No we don't always agree but we respect each other. We also keep in perspective that our marriage comes first and how we communicate, respect and deal with each other overflows into any dilemma we have even when it comes to our precious ones. If you are a step parent you have to love your spouses kids or when the other parent is behaving badly you wont consider the overall effect it has on the child. When they themselves are acting crazy you wont care to get to the bottom of it. I can say we genuinely love each others children and have treated them as our own. That is key. The Bible says that God is our first priority then our spouse then the children. If we as husband and wife get understanding and respect each other after seeking GOD first then when we confront these issues we can be on firm ground and unified to resolve them. We also keep each other level. I hope these examples help someone. Please give feedback.

Wisely Respected

For a while now I have been doing a lot of reflecting on my upbringing and the people that played such a major part in my rearing from my grandparents that have all gone on, to my parents who still provide all of us in the family so much wisdom about life, relationships, and spiritual growth daily. If they notice something airy with any of us they will surely address it. We even have adopted the concept that we are a village and it takes a village to raise kids, it takes a village to help cheer on a solid marriage, it even takes a village to help after a divorce to help repair. Our Matriarch and Patriarch, if you will, are the wisdom extraordinaires in our village and we respect them and utilize them to the fullest. If things get to crazy my parents have been known to call whoever has lost their mind to the table, with our immediate family (grownups only) so we can all talk it out and hopefully talk some sense into the person that has somehow strayed. Even my husband has jumped right in, sometimes I have to say HEY DONT TELL THEM THAT because he is so comfortable with our dynamics he will tell it all because he knows he is on level ground and its safe. My family doesn't take sides outside of RIGHT and WRONG. This means if I'm wrong I get called out for that and have to give account for it. Even in child rearing my sister and I both do a lot of yielding to family thoughts and suggestions. I always thought for the most part this was the norm in all families. I have always respected my elders and was required to have a certain type of etiquette period when it came to dealing with people. I think society has went very wrong in dropping some of the traditions those that came before us insisted on. In the effort to make life better for our children and ourselves the result is a bunch of rude, self entitled, and non ethical people that have no respect for elders, let alone wisdom. But in the world today so many people don't want wisdom, they don't want anything that goes against what makes them FEEL good and if you know like I know wisdom doesn't always feel like a happy time. So many parents have decided saying yes ma'am and no ma'am is a slave mentality, or to ask a child to do anything for you such as get a glass of water is just down right wrong. Heaven forbid you do like my parents did and do random room checks and phone checks because then you are invading their privacy. By the way I did ALL of those things to my kids with no shame. But then we wonder why so many of our younger generation is so confused, and crazy...its because society decided to reject wisdom, and parents have decided to make their children their equals and friends instead of raising productive sensible adults. Now don't get me wrong we have all had our share of wayward moments. That is to be expected with growth but to have a good foundation has helped me even in my lowest points in life. I am so glad I was not brought up in a time where respect was optional, or where parents treated me like a little grown up. I am even happier that I people around me that gave wise sound advise. Lastly, I'm grateful to still have a direct line to that wisdom. Maybe the world as a whole should re-think this new age way because it doesn't seem to be benefitting our children nor society. Proverbs 1:7 The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and instruction.

MEMOIRS OF AN IMPERFECT CHRISTIAN: Imperfectly Perfect "The Abernathy's"

MEMOIRS OF AN IMPERFECT CHRISTIAN: Imperfectly Perfect "The Abernathy's": Well I am 6 months in to being a Mrs. This time last year I was smack dab in the middle of planning our wedding. I am not afraid to say that...

Imperfectly Perfect "The Abernathy's"

Well I am 6 months in to being a Mrs. This time last year I was smack dab in the middle of planning our wedding. I am not afraid to say that is a task I would never want to do again so it is a good thing this is until death do us part. The last six months has been very interesting to say the least. I think it is important to write this because I think it is so important for people that see us to know that each day is a new adventure and we too face challenges. We just make choices everyday that our marriage is worth it. One of our challenges has been me being a tad selfish. I have spent years learning how to care about myself as a priority and to not feel guilty for doing that.Prior to that I did a lot of catering to anyone I was close to, add in being a single mommy and that basically left me drained of mental energy for myself. It wasn't until my son graduated and went to college did I kick more into a SELFish mode. I bought a 6 speed sport car that basically only seats me comfortably and maybe one passenger, I moved into my apartment with only my teenage daughter and me in mind without any thought of ever having to share space outside of us two. Annnnd I finally was sleeping smack in the middle of my bed comfortably.I cooked when I wanted, made up my bed or not when I wanted, and came and went as I pleased. I was ok with me finally. As SOON as I got SELF love down pat then"here come Mistah" making me share and consider him too. For him, this is a concept he has easily mastered. He is very thoughtful in his actions most times but at times gives me the side eye because I am not so much as thoughtful as he is at times. I will cook and share most things I have with him but for example when Andre gets in bed he pulls all the covers back so we can easily both get in, but when I get in bed I pull down my side only leaving his side fully made up w decorative pillows and all. It took him 5 months to finally one day point it out and express how selfish that was. I thought he was just being overly sensitive but after days of him pointing it out and ranting " started to remember more to pull his side back too. More so he would stop fussing, but also because I could see his point after days of him exasperatedly saying "Baby LOOK you You did it again!! This is ridiculous!" It was just an unconscious action, but one I obviously need to work on so I try to remember. This is a minor difference but one of many we have had to work through. Another adjustment is our personalities that mesh well most times but just like the saying says the same thing that makes you smile will make you cry, in our relationship its more like the same thing we love is the very same thing that works our nerves about each other. For people that dont know I am a very strong personality. My life experiences had to do one of two things make me strong or break me and God saw me through to be strong. Most times my strength is admired by Andre. He loves how strong I am, and realizes my strength doesn't make him weak. But there are days he has to pull rank on me by usually saying "Hey you're off the clock, so you can stop SUPERVISING now". I try to not be bossy but it is second nature for me. In most cases Andre ignores it unless its something he cares about, then he says no. I usually pout a bit but I get over it. Andre is such a sweetheart to me and gives me compliments and lots of affection. I always would feel bad that no one ever wondered if I was ok, or if I took time to eat or checked on me period. Andre does that and I make him nuts with that too. lol I am not used to "checking in" so I forget to say I made it usually until I have been wherever for about an hour. Another thing that often causes us to side eye each other is we have different ways of looking at almost every important scenario. Part of it is how we were raised an part of it is things we have experienced in our pasts so we have a bag full of emotional luggage that we are slowly unpacking the more time that passes. Lastly, I have 2 kids from a previous marriage but there is also the man who raised them that they acknowledge as their dad that I was in a very complicated relationship with for over a decade. Then he has 2 kids from a previous marriage and a previous relationship. Reading those last two sentences should give you a good idea of the challenges there. Oh and believe there are challenges! Then add we are over 40 and both set in our ways! People see us in pictures and think oooh they are cute, and WE ARE SO FREAKIN CUTE! I agree! And our happiness and love are real.I don't want to be like a lot of couples that display perfection, meanwhile they are acting a fool in REAL LIFE. I like people to know the real of any relationship is great Godly foundation and 100% from both people. Everyday we face different challenges. Andre works alllll my nerves some days and I turn around and work alllll of his nerves the other days but we are blessed with wisdom from previous relationships gone wrong, real love for each other, a true friendship, great counselors that have our best interest in mind and most of all our spirituality to help us get through each situation. Although we are far from perfect we are imperfectly perfect for each other and I wouldn't have it any other way. Thank you Andre for putting up with me, AND You're Welcome!