Wednesday, October 30, 2013
MEMOIRS OF AN IMPERFECT CHRISTIAN: God vs your potential mate parallel
MEMOIRS OF AN IMPERFECT CHRISTIAN: God vs your potential mate parallel: A while back I had a friend to ask me for some simple tips on dating and how you can tell when to run for the hills. I wrote this for her an...
God vs your potential mate parallel
A while back I had a friend to ask me for some simple tips on dating and how you can tell when to run for the hills. I wrote this for her and in hindsight realized I wrote it for me as well. I hope you enjoy it.
God meets you where you are. He accepts you. He doesn’t try
to change who you are but takes who you are and shows you how to take that and
be productive. He know just how to talk to you and loves you just as you are. The man you start to date should always accept you as you are.
He should never come in with the attitude of shaping you into what he wants you
to be. Now don’t get this confused with him wanting you to be all you can be.
That is a totally different thing, God wants you to be at your best and any man
you date should want the same. When I say he accepts you I mean your
personality, your ways, everything that makes you an individual and he
recognizes your strong points.If you are a thick girl…he shouldn’t
come in saying…I like skinny women…or if you are a natural woman he shouldnt come in with a box of perm for you to put on your head!
Do you realize God talks to us everyday? He is that
“something told me to…..” He talks to us through our dreams, through nature,
through song….and most important through his word. He doesn’t try to hide or
play games he talks to us and let’s us know he is real. The man you are dating
should be able to talk to you. God knows our language and what we mean without
translation. He should be able to hold
conversation with you, it doesn’t have to be deep…but it does need to happen.
Communication is so crucial in all relationships. If you cant talk to each
other then what will you do with each other when you have issues or problems.
Your man should want to know your language. That is part of knowing you. Also
learn his. (note to you…if you can’t
communicate with God openly…then you may have an issue truly being able to
communicate in your relationships)
Commit
God is fully committed to his relationship with you. (it’s
us that are iffy) He promises to love us, guide us, listen to us, comfort and
always be honest with us. (just a peak of all God is committed to do in our lives) I think we have the point here, but your mate
should be committed to you and making your relationship work. He should want to be
there to love, guide (yes), listen, comfort, and so on and so on. The truth
should always be the center of your relationship. God is truth. God is love.
Ok, are you getting this? You want the man you are with to reflect God as close
as possible. He can’t be perfect like God but he can possess certain qualities
that mirror your relationship with your heavenly Father.
Meet and Greet
Talk
Pursuit
Now here comes the juicy part and the fun. Do you know that
God wants a relationship with you, a real intimate relationship with YOU!!!?
Now don’t mistake pursuit with chase, no God will not chase you down and trip
you and jump on your back to get you to accept him. God does, however, show all
he has to offer to you if you just trust and lean on him. He shows you how much
better your life will be if you just commit to him. Your mate should do
something similar. What does he bring to the table? How can he enhance your
life? (note: Do not expect your MATE to be able to make you happy, you have to
have happiness from within, but he can enhance your happiness…if you count on
him to keep you happy, OH what a roller coaster ride you are in for, because he
can’t keep you happy all the time. That is why you have God first…ok?)
Lord I want to know
you and understand you see: Exodus 33:13
Draw Near to God:
James 4:8
Do not Awaken Love
Prematurely: Song of Solomon 8:4
God is Love: I Kings
8:23, 2 Chronicles 6:14, Zephaniah 3:17
TID BITS
As you read this ask yourself as well what you can bring to
the table? Are you accepting of your mate? Also don’t expect to have someone that
is something you are not. If you are selfish don’t expect your mate to not be.
If you don’t communicate well don’t expect communication to be good between
you. If you are not trustworthy then don’t expect him to be. I’m sure you are
catching what I mean. You have to love yourself first in order to receive, or
give love. As stated above, don’t expect your mate to be the center of your
happiness. That is too much pressure for anyone. If you are a miserable person,
there is nothing that poor man can do about that. That is something you have to
deal with prior to pursuing a relationship outside of your relationship with
God. God FIRST, then go for the man. LOL This will make your mate easier to
spot, you can spot the OH NO’S quicker too. Most important continue to trust
God and ask him what he thinks about who you are with, and to show you the real
man you are dating. Ask him to clear your mind past his looks, income, or
materials, or even how he makes you feel. Ask God for the deep stuff that will
matter in the long run. The one thing that I didn’t mention that I would think
would be a given…be sure the man knows God!
Tuesday, October 29, 2013
MEMOIRS OF AN IMPERFECT CHRISTIAN: Promise Keeper
MEMOIRS OF AN IMPERFECT CHRISTIAN: Promise Keeper: Not long after I started to write this blog I mentioned a promise I made to God to do six months of celibacy. It is a promise I made so lo...
Promise Keeper
Not long after I started to write this blog I mentioned a
promise I made to God to do six months of celibacy. It is a promise I made so long ago but it
seemed before to be so hard to keep. I had been told to do it by so many people. This time my mind was different though. I
was determined that I would keep my promise. I am not sure if it was more
because I felt like I was in a circle of insanity that needed to be broken and
I was convinced that I was being tortured as a result of me not doing what I said
I would do, or if I just knew that it was time to go to a new level and my
mind needed to be reset to follow my spirit. Either way I was determined. Now I
absolutely know that abstinence is what I should totally be but with me being a
person that has always been in over drive in that area I had to start here and
in the mist of this six months God showed me so many things that I was blind
to, He also showed me how I was using that as a tool for affection and a false
sense of security. WHOA! Typing that even gave me chills. My mind is so much
clearer now and I also got a chance to get confirmation about some things I was questioning. One of my great worries was that the man I love would freak out or
just be doing whatever he wanted to do while I was keeping this promise. He and I were
already at a weird cross road as it was what would this decision that, by the
way, I didn’t tell him I had made until maybe a month ago when we were talking,do to us. I had a fear of losing him all together and at the same time I had anger because it wasn’t fair for me to do this while he got off scot
free! Aren’t we funny that way when it
comes to God calling us to do something we don’t want to do? Why do I have to
do it and they don’t? That is as bad as
my kids fighting over whose piece of cake was bigger or how unfair it is to
have to help clean up when the other one made the mess. We all at some point
have complained about things not being fair or right. The first thing that came to mind once I stopped whining was that if its easy to do then it wouldn't be a sacrifice, and if it wasn't a situation that only God coudl have control over then how would He show His glory yet again to me? With that my lessons began! I quickly re-learned
that I can’t worry about what he should or shouldn’t be doing because this was
about what I needed to do. I also had to remind myself that God is in control
of all things including the man I love who is His child first! It was very hard at first and I had to
constantly replay in my head, “You can’t control anyone else’s choices, or
actions. God has your best interest at heart in all situations including this
one, and there are some things that need to be revealed through this to you.” After about a month of these self talks I began to truly relax and prepare
for the lessons my clear mind, and dedicated heart were to receive. God use this time to show me MYSELF! It wasn’t exactly a pretty site to see but it had to be done. The
first part He showed me was desperation. Desperation is an ugly trick of the
devil. In desperation you fall for things that make no sense, and settle for
the unsettling all because you feel your time is running out and anything beats where you are now. I cringed when I saw it on someone else and God was like hey…that
was you at some point. UGH! That is not cute and in desperation I have made some crazy choices that ended badly. The next thing He showed me was lack of confidence. I always considered myself pretty confident but I sometimes
struggle with not using sex as my confidence booster. I shared how in the past
I felt that was all I had to offer and although I know better now every so
often I start to slip into that old pattern I had set if I don’t catch it right
off. I was able to show self control though in these situations because I was tempted pretty heavily to jump off the wagon right onto a rock road! Next thing He showed me was that I am not the easiest person to get along with either. I complain quite a bit that my lovey is very hard at times but this was a simple reminder I'm no cake walk myself. In my defense I am the
first to tell the cost anyone pays when they date me. Next I saw the man I loves point of view and although
I don’t completely agree with some of his thoughts or how he communicates them I have a better understanding
of why he reacts the way he does. I learned more about his communication style
verses mine and just because they are different doesnt mean either way is wrong. And we are better friends because of it! (Aint God Good!)Lastly
God reminded me that HE HAS ME!! We as
Christians say we know God will take care of us and our needs but we often don’t
truly turn things over to Him and HIS will. I could worry myself silly trying to figure out how this relationship will go or I can work on the things that I know need work as far as I go. In the end I know I will have a happy ending. Don't get me wrong I by no means have this perfected
AT ALL but I am so glad that I saw these things for myself. Sadly half of my
lessons came through friends who were in various situations but while I was
sitting there shaking my head at how ridiculous their situations were I shook
my head right into a GIRL THAT WAS YOU!!! God shows us the ugly truth
when we are focused and ready to receive it it. Divine revelation is a wonderful thing!
Now I have reached my six month promise but I’m in no rush to jump into
anything which is another surprise to me! God has kept His promise to
show me things I needed to know, growing me and the man I loves friendship, and
taking care of those areas I feared but had and still have no control over. At the same time He made me a testimony to
someone else that may share the same experiences I have, and since I have been
there I can better understand the struggles involved with no judgment. I don’t mind
being the lesson when it can help someone else along the way. God is definitely
a Promise Keeper and I'm so glad if nothing else I can count on that to be a fact.
Sunday, October 27, 2013
MEMOIRS OF AN IMPERFECT CHRISTIAN: Be Grateful!
MEMOIRS OF AN IMPERFECT CHRISTIAN: Be Grateful!: Anyone that has older kids know that things can get really hectic with their schedules! Between my son having basketball practices and his ...
Be Grateful!
Anyone that has older kids know that things can get really
hectic with their schedules! Between my son having basketball practices and his
games, and my daughter cheerleading, choir and safety patrol duties, that is
enough to give every family member a head ache trying to keep up with it all.
To add to that my children have friends!!! That means birthday parties and
visiting and a bunch of Momma can I’s trying to go wherever. Last weekend my
kids were gone all weekend for the most part. If they weren’t spending time
with friends they were with cousins somewhere but they weren’t home. This
weekend I decided that I wouldn’t run myself silly and my kids would have to
just be satisfied with those in the house for their entertainment pleasures. My
sweet baby started to ask me Friday if she could venture out for the weekend. I
gave her my answer with more detail than she truly deserved but nonetheless
details. I ended up following those details with a stern talking to after she
decided to pout because she didn’t like that I wasn’t letting her go anywhere
this weekend. I was really annoyed with her for being so ungrateful after we
had ran her all over town all week, and I said yes all last weekend then this
one time I say no she has an attitude and has the nerve to be moping around
here like she never gets to do anything. As soon as I got through fussing and
grunting at her this message came to my mind….How often do I whine and complain
about one thing that didn’t go my way after God has blessed me with so many
other things that did!!! WHOA!!! I looked at our little sunshine as she walked
off thinking who knows what about me and wondered is that how I look when I’m
moaning and groaning about something I thought God should do in my life and His
will and mine were not on one accord. How ugly is that? I immediately felt bad and the desire to
start to work on this fault I had. I understood better that rejoicing in my “no”
moments is just as important as rejoicing in my “yes” moments. How often do we
focus on the things we don’t have not acknowledging the abundance of blessings
we do get? I may be the only one that has a ungrateful spirit from time to time
but on the off chance that I’m not I want to invite you to join me on the “I AM
GRATEFUL” challenge. I am grateful that God knows better than I do because the
reality is I have no clue what is best for me. So this means if He has said no
there is a good reason behind it, even if its something as simple as testing my
response to getting a no…will I walk away and pout and whoas me or will I say
ok God You know what’s best for me You must have something better in store
later. This is an important lesson of faith we have to learn from day to day. I’m
so glad God pointed this fault out to me so that I can better strive for
perfection.
Ephesians
4:29 - Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what
is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit
those who listen. (NIV)
Saturday, October 26, 2013
MEMOIRS OF AN IMPERFECT CHRISTIAN: Plug-ins
MEMOIRS OF AN IMPERFECT CHRISTIAN: Plug-ins: I was sitting here enjoying the fresh smell of a newly bought plug in. I love when I walk in and smell fresh linen in the scent in my hous...
Plug-ins
I was sitting here enjoying the fresh smell of a newly bought plug in. I
love when I walk in and smell fresh linen in the scent in my house. As I set
here thinking of how nice it smells I remember reading something that I believe
T.D Jakes wrote that was aimed towards women. He was basically telling women of
God to be careful what they let plug into their spirit. I often tell myself and
friends of mine this same thing. The first thing that comes to mind is intimate
relationships which is indeed one way but we can also allow co workers, friends
and even friends to plug into our spirit. This can be a fresh linen experience
which is beautiful and refreshing in our lives. Unfortunately, often we allow
spirits to plug into ours that are not refreshing or beautiful and before we even
realize it we have taken on those stinky ways. I used to hear my elders often
say "Who you are around is a reflection of who you are" I never really took that
to heart as a younger person but through experiences and relationships that
often unaware we take on attitudes, sadness, and problems of the people you are
around. Have you ever had a co-worker or person that was depressed or always had
issues an whenever they left you felt just as depressed as they were. You found
yourself wondering why you feel bad when your life is fine. You have allowed
that person to plug into your spirit. Be careful and be aware of this. When you
are ministering to people be sure to be prayed up and be aware. This seems to be
something that women especially have to be aware of. God made us to be covered.
Be sure that before you go into spiritual battle whether it be people you are
around, relationships, or people you minister to that God is your covering an
that the only spirits you allow to plug into your heart, mind and soul are the
FRESH LINEN SCENTS!
1 John 4:1
Friday, October 25, 2013
MEMOIRS OF AN IMPERFECT CHRISTIAN: Let HIM Hold You
MEMOIRS OF AN IMPERFECT CHRISTIAN: Let HIM Hold You: This is something I wrote for the women group I lead at my church W.O.W. I thought it would be neat to share with you all. Some of it wi...
Let HIM Hold You
This is something I wrote for the women group I lead at my church W.O.W. I thought it would be neat to share with you all. Some of it will be familiar to somethings I have already shared but its still a good read.
We as women like to feel secure. When you hear most women
talk about their needs the most you hear is they want to have time,
consistency, and affection. All of these things help you to feel secure. I
remember a lot of the times in dating I would just want to have someone there
to hold me while I slept. Since my divorce the main thing I missed was having
someone to hold me while I sleep. I am slowly learning to let God hold me. This
is not easy when you are used to using men for this. I did say USE. God wants
to hold you and provide that comfort and security that you desire to have. Have
you ever felt like no matter who you are with you don’t seem to get enough
love, affection, or security? Have you ever wondered how your relationship with
God may be affecting this part of your life? God wants to hold you and embrace
you in a way no earthly man can. There is a song called Falling In Love with
Jesus. Have you tried that? The words state, “ In His arms I feel protected. In
his arms never disconnected. In his arms I feel protected. There’s no place I
would rather be.” Does that not cover all that you desire? WOW! That is awesome.
It can be hard though when you are used to seeking a person to comfort you, you
almost go through somewhat of a withdrawal initially. Once you find comfort in
knowing that God is your comfort then you can have peace in His arms. When you
find that peace in His arms that will take away the desperation that tends to
happen searching for man to be able to comfort you. That will make you more
focused, and keep you from attracting men that recognize the neediness in you.
Have you ever had a friend or acquaintance that always ends up with the same
type of abusive man and you wonder why she keeps getting these men that are
abusive…there is something in her that attracts those men. Until that thing is
changed within her by her learning to let God hold her then she will continue
an endless cycle of bad relationships. For example I used to be a thug magnet.
I mean I loved me a thuggish man, and they loved me. I always would say that
the other guys were boring or square, then I would add but he is a nice guy,
and is good to me. Which parts of that was true. However, these relationships
were doomed from the start. Initially it was just fun, and they always were
sweet, but then came being afraid all the time of things that could happen,
jail, shooting, and God knows what else. Time would pass and I would question
how “nice” they were if they were doing things that would hurt other people and
their families. Whether it was selling drugs or just beating up the local crack
head. I would struggle to change him, and convince him that my way of living
made more sense, all because I wanted to make it work. I could never change
him. We always ended up going separate ways because of our differences. It was until I changed my way of thinking, and
something about how I carry myself did I stop attracting the “thug”. LOL It is
very rare that they even look my way now. If they do I am not looking theirs. I
know a big part of that was my growth in the word of God. The more I grow
spiritually the more confident I become in myself. The more I walk and talk
with God the more I love myself. It is the intimacy I have with God that has
changed in me. Now I am not perfect, no one is, but I am growing and recognize
the changes. I want you to concentrate of letting God hold you. Let him hold
you with his word, peace, love, patience, truth, comfort…I could go on and on.
God has endless capabilities for you. In the mist of his arms you will be
nurtured and grow into the woman God intended you to be from the start. Take
charge and get off the endless roller coaster of bad relationships, whether it
be friendships or relationships. Tell God you want an intimate ongoing relationship
with Him so that you can have healthy relationships in your day to day lives.
Let God hold you first, so the next person that holds you deserves to be there.
WORD SAYS
Psalm 119: 2
How blessed are those who observe His testimonies,
Who seek Him with all their heart( check out this whole chapter of Psalms)
Who seek Him with all their heart( check out this whole chapter of Psalms)
Psalm 130: 7 O
Israel, put your hope in the LORD, for with the LORD is unfailing love
and with him is full redemption
Psalm 136 READ IT ALL…His LOVE endures forever!(smiles)
Song of Solomon: 8:6 Place me like a seal over your heart,
like a seal on your arm; for love is as strong as death, its jealousy [Or
ardor] unyielding as the grave. [Hebrew Sheol] It burns like blazing fire, like
a mighty flame. [Or / like the very flame of the LORD]
Isaiah 54:10 Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be
removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my
covenant of peace be removed," says the LORD, who has compassion on you
HEY KEEP READING THE WORD! These are just examples that
actually have love in them but there are testimonies of God’s love from Genesis
to Revelation!! Remember to let Him hold you, and embrace God into your daily
living.
Thursday, October 24, 2013
MEMOIRS OF AN IMPERFECT CHRISTIAN: Woman's Place
MEMOIRS OF AN IMPERFECT CHRISTIAN: Woman's Place: One of the things that me and my friends do is sit around and talk about our significant others or the lack of significance in the male spe...
Wednesday, October 23, 2013
Woman's Place
One of the things that me and my friends do is sit around
and talk about our significant others or the lack of significance in the male
species just depending on what is going on with us. With my girls we all are
pretty much on the same page but in a room full of women I don’t know as well I
tend to get dirty looks and eyes rolled at me when I begin to talk about how
women have a role and place when it comes to relationships. It goes so far
beyond giving him the business at least once a week and looking cute. Now
before I start this blog let me say we are not talking about what the men don’t
do today…we will save that for another post day. Let’s talk about us today. J One of the most
interesting things I saw on a post I was reading was a man stating that, “Women
want a man that handles business, takes care of home, and leads like old school
men used to but they do none of the things old school women did.” I absolutely couldn't
argue with him on that as much as I wanted to. All I could say was well….so….! I
couldn't argue with him because I have sat and listened to SOOO many women tell
me that I’m crazy for cooking for my man when there are Burger Kings, McDonalds
and Taco Bell stays open all night long. Now, I am
perfectly fine cooking and cleaning, doing this and that because I am even more
perfectly fine with HIM changing tires, taking care of the car, taking out the
trash and the dangerous task of killing any critter that I think may cause me
harm or despair. I have called my sweetie
from his house before to kill a wasp that was terrorizing us and even though he
thought it was beyond ridiculous to get off his cozy couch to kill a bug he came!(MY
HEROOOOO) I could go into why women are out of roles and why men are not in
their roles but that is not what my focus is this time. It’s more about our
expectations as women vs what we put out to attract real MEN. We complain if a
man wants us to cook but think he is pretty sorry if we can’t call him to change
a tire. We expect a whole lot for little to nothing or we exchange way too much
for someone who brings nothing at all to the table while the good guy is
shaking his head at our stupidity. Now
let me say I am surely no expert in love but I can definitely give input on
what I know and have learned these last eight years or so. If you listen great
if not…carry on. I was raised to believe
that men were responsible for taking care of the household spiritually,
financially, physically and mentally. That doesn't mean he sits and bosses
everyone around, or whoops up on everyone in the house or any of that
craziness. He makes sure things are in order and safe for his family. Whether
we realize that or not that is a great, tiring, high pressured, frustrating, responsibility
for a man to handle. In return the woman is the person that spiritually backs
him, nurtures the household, mentally reassures, builds up and when needed
gives him a push that he can accomplish these things. She doesn't carry him on
her back….but she helps him to see clear when things seem all blurred. She is almost like his cheer leader daily! He
can depend on her to be honest and encouraging all in one. He knows her opinion
will be honest and what is best for him. She is not a thorn in his side, or a kill
joy! There is a verse in the Bible that
says “It’s better for a man to live on a roof top than in a house with a
quarreling woman” It’s funny at first glance but so many men, including the
one I love, has said no one wants to come home after a long days working hard
to an un-peaceful environment with someone that never appreciates anything and
has nothing but complaints as soon as he walks in the door. I had to learn this
method the hard way I am embarrassed to say. I would get irritated about something
with him and think on it all day long and by the time he hit the door I was
raring to discuss all he hadn't done and all that I was going to do if he didn't
do better. I didn't really care about his day and as time went on I noticed he
looked simply miserable when he came home. Then I got mad about that and fussed
about that. Then he shut down and guess what…I got even madder at the nerve he
had to not want to talk about how stupid he was being. In my defense he always
had dinner and a clean house and I looked the best I could when he saw me
before I started to complain. J
It was much later and lots of frustration on both our parts later that he
shared how irritating my timing would be and that he cared about my thoughts
but at least let him regroup from being beat up all day at work. He wanted a
little tenderness and a smiling face instead he was met with the bride of
Chucke as soon as he hit the door. This
is an area I had to work hard at because my mouth is pretty expressive to say
the least and my timing is not the best when I have a point to make. We want a man to treat us like ladies but when
we open our mouths we sound like sailors. We want a gentleman but we don’t have
the patience to wait for him to do it because we want it done in our own time.
We don’t want him to rush us to have sex but when he doesn't we rush him. I have purposely looked at things I needed to
work on and the domestic stuff is easy but those things that create peace I
have been working on a lot. I don’t want my Hero to be hiding by the chimney because
my head is spinning on the inside of the house. Which of these things do you
see that needs work? Maybe you are like me and fight with harsh words bringing
him down, or maybe he wants a hot meal and is always getting tacos or burgers
from fast food places, or maybe he needs a friend and you have no time and he
needs to just man up! We all have areas to work on including me. An these are
just a few things that we are supposed to do. If you need a list and you don’t believe
me check out Proverbs 31:10-31! When I read that list I realize I have lots of
responsibility and accountability to carry to be ready for my King….how about
you?
Monday, October 21, 2013
I Got Joy Joy Joy Joy Down in My Heart!
Have you ever woke up in a great mood ready for the world
then someone forces you to go off on them because they cut you off on the
freeway? Or your co-worker that is not your favorite gets on that last nerve
you reserved just for them? Or your kids just refuse to cooperate or behave
anyway like you have showed them to be the proper way? What is the first things
we say? Now see you have messed up my entire day! Or he/she has pulled me out
of my happy place…OR the Devil always stealing my joy. Those are just to name a
few. But my question to you is this...Can someone truly steal your joy or do
you give them your joy or feel good moment?
I used to work for a place prior to my current position and initially I loved
what I did. I didn't have to talk on the phone much at all. I did most of my
work through the systems set and email. Anyways back to my story. We switched
supervisors and to put it simple she lacked the skills that any professional
should posses. She would refer to us as b*****s when she talked to us. I
remember her specifically saying, “I know you b*****s went and reported me!” I
just sat and turned to the rest of my co-workers with the reply, “She must be
talking to you b*****s because she is NOT talking to me!” She and I clashed
quite a bit because of her mouth and lack of professional behavior. I must
admit there were a few days that all sense of pleasure I had doing my job
disappeared. I would wake up thinking of excellent call in excuses, and when I was
at worked I stayed plugged in to my headsets with them on blast for my entire
day just so I didn't have to hear her voice at all. I tried talking to her
superior, and even meeting with her and someone else mediate but nothing seemed
to help. Then one day I recall her saying that she knows I am mad at her every
single day. It was kind of funny because when I made this next statement I didn't
realize how true it was. I replied, “I don’t care enough about you to allow you
to have me mad daily!” Of course when I said it I meant for it to sound as mean
as it came out but it was true. No I didn't wish her any harm or any of that,
even if at this point I thought about causing her some myself. I did however
realize that I was in control of my own feelings and happiness and by allowing
her to cause me such stress was giving my power over my own emotions away. WOW!
Who wants to give someone like that their power? Not me. I purposely made
myself be in a happy place in my head even though it seems I was in the pits of
hell daily at work. It was the best thing I could do for me. I was able to
smile and say good morning to her in the morning and mean it. I could
communicate with her and I even would head special days for her such as bosses
day or her birthday when no one else ever wanted to. I even would listen to her
talk about her guy problems. (yes I know!) So I am telling this brief story to
say we control how we feel and how we allow others to make us feel. No one can
steal your joy, not even the devil. If we lose it, it really is because we gave
it away. So the next time someone is ruining your day, morning, moment, or
ENTIRE week…remember that you can stop that at any point. Keep your Joy.
Tuesday, October 15, 2013
HAPPY MONDAY!
Yesterday started off early at 5:30 am! I woke up feeling
refreshed, well rested and ready to start my week off RIGHT! I made sure I prayed
and had a moment of peace and quiet which was a big thing for me! I went to the
Joyce Meyer convention this past weekend and had a great time while getting
some very valuable information that I was rearing to implement in my day to day
life. I got my little girl up without having to repeatedly remind her she was
supposed to be woke ten minutes ago. I got dressed and the plan was to come
back to the house after I took her to the bus stop and use that thirty minutes before
I had to wake up my son to leave working on the prayer retreat lessons and
activities. I had it all worked out and was so proud of myself! YAY! I walked
outside in the pitch dark to take Wootie to her bus stop and my tire was
completely flat. (blank stare) I grabbed her hand and we hiked up the hill to
wait for her bus, and I decided that maybe I could make it to a air pump after I
get her on the bus. This was going to take me the entire time I had set aside
to study and start to put things together for the prayer retreat. Wootie got on
her bus and I went back to my car and realized there was no way I was making it
to the gas station. Unfortunately, my mom had to wake up my Daddy to try to
help me get the tire fixed. Now I am beginning to wonder should I call in or
not but I didn’t. Daddy went to get some fix a flat which unfortunately couldn’t
fix that flat. Then the neighbor was kind enough to let us use his compressor.
In the mist of all of the commotion I called “my hero, my love” to tell him the
car was on flat. I got quickly frustrated with him because he didn’t seem to
have any real solutions but mostly questions. We waited for the compressor to
fill the tire for thirty minutes before we decided it wasn’t going to and it
was best for me to just catch a ride to work, and Ma took our son to school. I
am becoming more and more agitated by the moment that “my hero” hadn’t so much
as called to see if I was ok. How selfish of him to not even check on me. I
have been working on keeping my mouth shut, yes I know, but I’m working on it
so I didn’t say a word to him. Ok so here I am on a Monday with a flat tire, didn’t
get to study or get anything done for the prayer retreat, no money to get a
tire or even fix it, AND to top it off the man I love is not offering one bit
of empathy for me! To top it off in the mist of all the mess I didn’t fix
breakfast or bring a lunch and all I had was a little over a dollar in change! Sigh…I
typed fiercely in text complaining to one of my sisters ,who is familiar with
me and my relationship and always seems to help me to be level headed, about
how hurtful it is that he won’t even check on me, and how this day started off
horribly and I didn’t get a chance to study or anything! The devil is picking
on me today!(GLOOM DESPAIR AND AGONY ON ME!!!!) I get to my desk hungry and
just glad to have made it within the time I needed to not be late. It then
dawned on me that I had danish in my desk and a bottle of orange juice that I had
saved from last week. I had breakfast! I didn’t have a car so I asked a co
worker if she would mind getting me something off the dollar menu with the
change I had and she told me to tell her what I wanted and she would buy it and
to keep my dollar. I had lunch!!! I decided to take my books and notes with me
and used my hour lunch break to spin ideas and lessons for the retreat. I was
still really upset that he didn’t call and check on me, but I needed a ride
home so I asked him to please get me from work. I regrouped my attitude, put on
some lip gloss and re-pinned my hair before he got there because I can’t be
looking a hot mess when he sees me even if I felt like one. I put on a happy
face, and I just resolved in my head that there was no point in staying mad at
him at least he was coming to get me. I get in the car and he turns to me and
gives me a list of things that are going to take place to take care of the tire
and he had already taken care of the cost and everything. I just looked and
felt so relieved that I hadn’t said A WORD to him about how I was feeling, and very
happy that he took charge and didn’t have to fret about it anymore! MY HERO!!!!!(batting
my eyes) WHOOOOO!!! I told this long story to say a few things first of all
things don’t always go as planned but God uses those opportunities to show us
how He works things out even when our own plan fails. Things would have been a
lot worse if neither of my parents were willing to help me because I nor my son
would have gone anywhere. If I wouldn’t have made a mad dash last week for
those Danish and orange juice then I wouldn’t have had breakfast already. God
knew Monday would be MANIC!!! So He made sure that was taken care of. Then God
showed me kindness from someone else by using my co worker to be a blessing to
me when I was ok with just getting a ninety nine cents chicken sandwich, God
saw to me getting an entire meal. God showed where I still had time to do work
for Him during my lunch break for an hour instead of thirty minutes. He sent me
the greatest ideas and thoughts in the mist of that time! Then He AGAIN showed
me that everything I feel emotionally isn’t necessarily true. He showed me that
just because the man I love doesn’t communicate the same way I do, or isn’t nearly
as verbal as I would like doesn’t mean he is not thinking of me and God
redeemed him in my eyes as “MY HERO” yet again! Oh…and that keeping my mouth
shut is not such a bad idea sometimes to avoid misunderstandings, at least
until I see the situation through in its entirety! WOW!!! LOOK AT GOD!!! It
turned out to be a HAPPY MONDAY after all!
Sunday, October 13, 2013
MEMOIRS OF AN IMPERFECT CHRISTIAN: So You Call Yourself A Christian
MEMOIRS OF AN IMPERFECT CHRISTIAN: So You Call Yourself A Christian: So You Call Yourself A Christian When I was a teenager one thing that would drive me more nuts than anything is when another girl w...
So You Call Yourself A Christian
So You Call Yourself A Christian
Wednesday, October 9, 2013
WAGING WAR II
One of my favorite songs by CeCe Winans is Waging War! The lyrics repeat a protest of, “I'm
tired of principalities messing with me(Waging
war)I'm tired of the devil stealing
from me(Waging war)I promise he won't get one more thing(Waging
war)I'm taking it back taking territory(Waging war)I'm
ready for the battle I'm ready to win(Waging war)my weapon
of power He lives within(Waging war)I can't be defeated
the enemy gotta flee(waging war)I'm taking it back taking
territory” I love how she sounds so confident that she is
the winner of the battle when she sings it. I feel the confidence all over me.
One thing that we often don’t realize daily we wake up with a battle to fight and
if we are unaware of that we fall into all kinds of pits. Last year was the
first year for me planning the All Night Women’s Prayer Retreat. I knew that I
would meet some challenges but I had no idea how hard those challenges would be.
I had crazy stuff going on from the finances, the kiddos, and the man. I was
very overwhelmed and beyond exhausted but I did recognize what was going and no
matter how upsetting these situations were I continued to pray and ask God to
show me the way. I fought and fought and fought my way through all the madness….and
needless to say the retreat was a true blessing and I lived to see yet another
day for battle. It’s that time of year again and we are gearing up for the
retreat again with an awesome topic of Daughters of the King! An you guessed it
the devil drama has started right up as soon as I send out the invites and get
my crew in order! The difference is the reaction to the pitfalls and traps that
are set. Last year I wasn’t surprised but I was in tremendous despair but this year
I pray that I keep a level head. I also realize that I am at a different level
than I was last year because I kept fighting. An I am always ready to see where
God is taking me next. Do you recognize your daily battles? Do you realize that
the more you grow the more test you will have? I mean you can’t believe the
devil would give up your soul that easy when his is condemned for all of
eternity to burn. I challenge you to get up every single day ready to WAGE WAR
knowing the battle is already won over your life, and your soul. When you are
doing great things in the name of The Lord expect great tests, but just know
after the test is a great reward.
Monday, October 7, 2013
CHOKE HOLD
I am a person that loves very hard which is good…when its
used in the right perspective. I am go getter and most people that know me know
that if I set my mind to something I really press towards trying to get it…which
can be good….again in the right perspective. Top that off with assertive and
stubborn and boom there you go. I admit that I have a tendency to hold tight to
my ideals and desires. Recently I blogged about how I made a six month celibacy
promise to God because for me to purposely not have sex for ANY amount of time is
a challenge but six months to me is like years. I must say I didn't want to do
this for a few reason one being the obvious thing…I wanted to do what I wanted
to do. I didn't want to be uncomfortable but most of all I didn't want the man I
love to be sleeping with anyone else. In all honestly that was the main reason I
hadn't kept the promise the first few times I made. I was scared of what he
might do. I mean to me it seemed very unfair for me to stop and he possibly go
all willy nilly doing whatever and that in no way matched what I wanted.
Finally, I decided that keeping my promise was more important than my physical
desires or my love interest. That was hard for me because in both cases I was
putting my own desires aside to do what I told God I would do. Initially, I didn't
have much support from a few of my friends. They didn't seem very optimistic
that I could or would do it. I made up my mind FINALLY that in the big scheme
of things I absolutely have no control over what anyone else does other than me
which launched me to not have concern about what he may or may not do but only
on what I plan to do and trusting that God will work the rest out. Five months
has past an I have seen so many great things during this five months about
myself and my actions that I never would have got if I would not have stopped
the things I was doing. I have a clear head and see things in a different way.
And I let go of the fears I had and took on a “If God says it, it is so!” Not
if Sharhonda says it but God. That was the most amazing thing I could have done
and as a result he and I are great friends. We have been able to truly talk. I
am not constantly pressuring him or pushing him. Not because my desires changed
but because I know no matter what happens it will be in my favor in the end. I
said all of this to say sometimes we hold on so tight to those things that we
want or desire we choke the life out of it. All we have to do is step back and
put God first. So even in this last month home stretch I am in no rush to jump
back into things, but just soaking in the fact that God is doing some awesome things
right before my eyes. What thing do you have a choke hold on in your life
because you fear losing something or don’t want to give up your own desires…let
it go and it will start to breathe and flourish right before your eyes.
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