Tuesday, April 21, 2015
Dating is Not a Foreign Concept
Dating for real??? I will be one of many to say that being single is challenging. One of the most frustrating things for me is the whole "so called" dating process society has put in place. My Daddy always taught me that a man should want to spend time with me openly and get to know me without automatically assuming that after he would be getting anything aside from a good conversation and a thank you and if its really good another date. Unfortunately, a lot of men have somehow lost this process along the way and replaced it with coming to each others house and "hookin up" with each other, which I often tell my friends is a trap which will leave you most times feeling very disappointed in yourself. This is something I even have to admit I have fell for. (Imperfect remember?)When I tell a man we can meet and bowl or eat dinner I have heard men complain that women just trying to get a free meal. I would think if you are pursuing me seriously I am worth a meal at the least sir!!!. I really get annoyed that if/when I go on a date the man thinks my cookie is up for negotiation and often asks if he will be rewarded with it if we go. It always amazes me that anyone would think buying a meal is equal to me giving one of my best assets in exchange. Seriously? 😐 I can go on and on about this topic but believe it or not this is not a griping post...recently my faith in the dating system was restored. I'm disappointed to say I was so used to the craziness I didn't recognize the TRUE process initially. Let me say first Im not bragging at all but merely reassuring my sisters all hope for true dating is not lost. When I started dating this man he told me his intent in regards to me in the beginning..and what his needs were...and we set our own rules and boundaries along the way. It helped that we are friends so we could do that fairly quick and honestly. Men know what they want yawl...they aren't confused as they pretend to be or we like to believe they are. Dont rush them but dont believe they have no clue what plan they have in mind for you. They do. A big part of my goal is to be a peaceful place for him when we are together so we go places together just for fun whether it be a walk in the park, dinner or whatever just to spend time. We dont always have to spend money....the time is what counts. When we are out with each other he is very complimentary and chivalrish which unfortunately I had gotten used to not having. Am I the only one who has been on a date and was sure people looking had no clue we were out together because the person seemed disconnected...Now I can't imagine life with anyone that didn't exhibit these characteristics . Most of all we usually do stuff that caters to my need to talk...lol He knows I love to talk and since we both have hectic lives I have lots to share and ask and for that time period I have his undivided attention. We talk on the phone but there is nothing like face to face conversation and feedback. I am not sure how it will all pan out for us but I have to say he is and has restored a lot of ideals that I thought for sure were mere fantasy in our society. Yessssss....all hope is NOT lost for us. So take it from one single person to another dating isn't a lost practice...don't sell yourself short or conform to anything less but be reasonable in your expectations.
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